It’s Not Too Late to Claim Your Space
What mountain biking taught me about confidence, courage, and reclaiming space in midlife - one wobbly step at a time.
This summer, I was fortunate to find myself back in Whistler, a mountain-top playground and one of the world’s premier downhill mountain biking centres.
It’s not my first trip. I first came in my 20s, and back then it never even occurred to me to go mountain biking. That was for the fearless, knarly dudes.
It wasn’t something “someone like me” could do.
The story I told myself
I was a clumsy kid. I knew it, everyone told me it, and the evidence on my knees confirmed it.
Maybe today I would have been tested for dyspraxia. But in the 70s and 80s, if you tripped over your own feet and regularly walked into doorframes, you were just labelled clumsy.
Over time, the story stuck.
And eventually, I stopped trying new physical things. Avoiding embarrassment and shame felt easier than proving myself “rubbish” all over again.
Maybe you’ve got your own version of that story, the one that’s quietly told you what you can or can’t do.
Question
What’s the story you’ve been carrying that still shapes how you see yourself?
I don’t belong here…
So, when I thought of mountain biking, the image in my head wasn’t someone like me.
It was fearless, gnarly types. Mostly male, mostly extreme, speaking in a language of “epic,” “rad,” and “shredding.”
And when you grow up believing you’re clumsy, that space feels like a closed door. There was no way I could take part; even taking a lesson felt completely out of reach.
Better to play it safe, stay in your lane, stay small.
Question
Are there spaces you tell yourself “I don’t belong” and is that really true?
Fast forward to my 50th year, and here I am having just completed some downhill trails at Whistler.
If you’d told my twenty-year-old self I’d be doing this at 50 I’d have laughed in your face and yet sometimes, how far you’ve changed is clearer in the review mirror.
Small Steps
This wasn’t an overnight decision or a sudden burst of courage. It was built step by step, over the last few years.
It began in lockdown, when I was just looking for an activity we could enjoy as a family. I started on gravel paths, wobbling as I tried to stand on the pedals, gripping the brakes for dear life on the downhills. Jaw set, teeth clenched, heart pounding — seriously questioning what on earth I was doing!
And then, little by little, something shifted.
Standing up on the pedals a little longer.
Letting the bike carry me instead of fighting gravity.
A squeal as I felt my first tiny bit of air — okay, probably only a few centimetres, but it felt like so much more.
I wasn’t soaring, but I was doing it. Wobbling counts.
Bravery Doesn’t Come First
Here’s what surprised me: bravery doesn’t arrive before you start. Confidence grows through doing.
Research backs this up — our brains learn by experience, not by waiting until we “feel ready.”
Question
Where are you holding back because you’re waiting to feel “ready enough”?
Doing It My Way
So, after all these little steps. by the time we returned to Whistler this year, I thought: “Okay then, I can give this a go.”
Not fast. Not flashy. Just steady, at my own pace.
And that’s when the real shift happened for me. It was when I stopped measuring myself against the “rad riders” and gave myself permission to do it my way.
Okay yes, many people looked far more fearless tearing down the slopes, but for me, this was seismic. That’s the point: bravery is relative. What looks small from the outside might be huge for you.
I chose to take up space in my own way. To find joy in the doing, and courage on my terms.
A Simple Framework
Looking back, I can see a pattern in the way those small wins added up. It’s one I now notice in so many parts of life, and maybe you’ll recognise it too.
Notice the old story — What’s the story you’ve been telling yourself, the belief that holds you back?
Start small — Choose a safe experiment that feels doable.
Build through doing — Progress doesn’t need to look polished to matter. Each “wobbly” step creates the ground for the next.
Reclaim your space — Courage isn’t about meeting someone else’s standard, it’s choosing what’s right for you. Define success in your own way, not someone else’s.
My Message for You
So many of us stop ourselves before we even begin, convinced we need to be perfect or fit a mould.
There is space for you. You don’t have to do it perfectly. You can start small. You can reclaim your space. And often, you only notice how far you’ve come when you look back.
✨ If this resonates, explore a Rediscover session where we can look at the stories holding you back and find the small steps that move you forward.